Mighty Morphin Power Lawyer!
by martheev
Summary: Again, another dated parody. This one shot story includes both General Hospital and Power Ranger parody. Tell me what you think, good or bad. Thanks for reading!


Enough pieces of Zordon fell into the Power Chamber after being blown  
apart by Andros in space. He takes one look at the place and  
realizes that he's going to need a little help.

"Alpha 5!"

"Ay yi yi yi yi! Zordon! You're back! I'll alert the Rangers  
and..."

"No Alpha. I need you to do something different today. This place  
is a sty. I need someone to clean this place up, and fast!"

Alexis Davis sat unknowing how different her life would end up  
today. She threw some random papers and sighed. That's when she  
began to feel the pull. In a few seconds, she was gone in a blur.

She reappeared in the Power Chamber, looking disheveled from her ride  
over.

"I ask for a cleaning person and you send me THIS unorganized freak?  
Oh well, I'm sure she'll be fine once I give her the power."

"I...I'm sorry, what power?"

"You know, the power? Aw here."

And in a poof Alexis gained a suit, beard, glasses, and a really  
bad hairpiece.

"THIS power. The power of...DOBSON!"

Alpha stuck up his digit. "Uh Sir, that doesn't really sound all  
that intriguing. Maybe you shouldn't say it with such oofph."

"EVERYTHING must be said with OOFPH! We're trying to be SUPERHEROS  
here!"

"Actually all you're trying to do is keep you're lazy ass from  
cleaning the place up!"

Zordon "Hmm"ed. "Okay so you're right about that one. That is your  
job now Alexis. Whenever I call for you to, use your Power Morpher  
and call upon your ancient powers to morph into Dobson."

"I'm sorry Sir but, would you care to explain to me just why I should  
do this for you?"

Zordon rolled his eyes. "Because the power chose you you are the one  
blah blah blah. Geeze it was easier working with teenagers for  
crying out loud!"

Dobson shrugged and got to work dusting and vacuuming.

Within a few minutes Zordon got bored. "Okay, this is tedious.  
Alpha, I need some company. Bring to me someone who knows  
everything. Well, I'd settle for someone who thinks they do anyway."

Cameron Lewis was standing at his office mirror. "You are a champ.  
Well, at least until it comes to that whole 'father' thing."

The next thing he knew he was in the Power Chamber. He took a look  
over to his side. "Alexis? You're a...man. Is this a gay thing?"

Zordon snickered. "No, try teenage boys in spandex outfits. Now  
THAT'S gay!" Zordon sat back in thought for a moment. "Although the  
girls didn't look half bad. Mmmm. Kimberly Hart. Oh yeah." Then a  
sad look crossed his face. "Man it's times like these I wish I had  
hands so I could whack around."

Cameron pouted thoughtfully at the tube. "Well, I only see one head  
up there. Maybe you should think about getting some genitalia  
first. Trust me this is professional advice. It's the only kind I  
give." Cameron said with a wink.

"Hey yeah you're right. Hey Alpha could you program me some..."

"For the last time Zordon, NO!"

Zordon whined. "Stupid bastard robot."

With a cleaner, a discusser, and no genitalia, Zordon was ready to  
begin living again. Just don't uh, ask them to save the world or  
anything.

WEEOO! WEEOO! WEEOO!

"Okay, now I know this wasn't in the original job description, but  
Rita Repulsa and Lord Zedd have come out of hiding. They must have  
somehow learned I was back. They've sent Goldar and Rito to wreck  
havoc in Port Charles. It's up to you to stop them!"

"Gee I don't know..." Alexis opened her eyes and realized they had  
already been transported to town. "That no good no balled head guy!"

Cameron shrugged. "Well for ONCE I don't know what to do. You?"

Alexis shrugged. "Nope, no clue."

An agitated voice came from out of nowhere. "Use the Morphers. Call  
on your powers. Sheesh the teens figured THAT one out!"

So Alexis and Cameron took out their Power Morphers, raised them  
high, and called out the names if their ancient powers.

"Stuffy English Guy!"

"Cocky Psychologist!"

And poof the change was complete.

Dobson looked at Cameron who had no outfit to speak of. "What  
exactly is different about you?"

Cameron looked himself over, then shrugged. "Don't know. I feel  
pretty much the same."

"Well I certainly agree with you Sir."

"I highly doubt that was a compliment. And remember, I'm always  
right."

"Oh I don't believe it was one ither Sir."

"Okay, you want to get truthful, because I can tell you what your  
problem is right now."

"Oh I DO so hope you can tell me Sir."

"This whole cross dressing thing? It's because you want to be a man!"

"Yes. I desire to scratch myself and spit about all the time Sir."

"Hey, don't make fun of my wonderful advice!"

"I believe some other name would be more appropriate Sir."

"No. No no no. There is some deep rooted testosterone in you  
Alexis. And this is just a manifestation of some unrequited love  
affair that you want. Probably with Carly or Skye. You pretend to  
hate them so much, but maybe that's lust. As long as it isn't  
Alice." Cameron took a second to get the image in his head, then  
broke into a full body shiver.

"Bravo Sir, you've cut me to my quick."

"Damn right I did! You expected less?"

That comment sent the two into such an argument that they didn't even  
notice that their enemies had enlarged. Goldar and Rito shrugged at  
each other, then Goldar smashed the two "heroes" under his foot. The  
two monsters locked elbows and then whistled a happy tune as they  
disappeared over the horizon.

Well...we'd tell you to watch it this Fall, but it appears our stars  
have just been killed. Hope you enjoyed this...uh...special made for  
Yahoo movie from your friends at JAB.


End file.
